The rest of your life ( also my first blog ever)!!

Well hello there fellow internet bloggers! ( or random passers by who have some how stumbled upon this). So, In the mist of another one of my procrastination routines, which begins with me being extremely motivated to do important tasks such as writing my personal statement that will potentially dictate the rest of my life, I've decided to create a blog!! Now, I know what you're thinking ' who on earth is this idiot?', which to give credit where it is due, you are right about - but but but give me a chance you lovely people! Any who, I am not in any sense of the word an author or anything even remotely along those lines, i'm just a 17 year old loser sat in her bedroom sharing her thoughts with the world. Why? Well it's possibly just a phase I'm going through, like that twitter phase I went through last September in attempt to make friends in college. But, I think an even better explanation is that I have too much of these ramblings in my head and I feel like If I don't do something with them, my brain will explode. So here I am spilling my heart out ( not literally * ha ha*) to most probably nobody; I've just made this blog and well lets be honest why would anyone read this crap anyway. 

This blog is going to be about the situation I am currently going through, which is the dreaded transition from college to university * dun dun dun *. I have always been extremely excited to go to university ever since I could possibly remember. I remember being at the tender age of 11, sat there reading various books envisioning myself as this strong independent woman, learning and developing. I've always loved learning and when I was younger I didn't have much friends but I never cared because good grades were much more important than friends right? RIGHT?! I'm not nearly as bad as that now, I love my friends! Even nearly as much as books * ha* just kidding, I do love them copious amounts. 

But now the time has arrived where I am applying to university all I want to do is slow down time. It's quite ironic because all I ever wanted to do growing up was grow up faster and now I just want it to stop so I can take it all in. Of course I am excited but It is also so sudden and the pressure is slowly staring to take every little bit of my energy. The thing with me is I love learning, I really do love learning but I've very excitable so for a couple of months I will be set on the idea that I want to do one thing for the rest of my life. I will love and admire the idea of that and I will work damn hard to achieve the grades for it but then I will have a change of heart and find this new amazing thing I want to do for the rest of my life.  I guess what I'm trying to say is I don't want to choose a course to do at university, get there and completely change my mind. That definitely wouldn't be a good thing to do. There is always the option of a gap year which honestly I do love the idea of ( see look I'm at it again!) but I've researched gap year options and well to but if bluntly i'm can't bloody afford them! I wouldn't say I'm poor, I'm extremely grateful for everything my mum has given me, but we do not have a lot of disposal income and gap year opportunities such as going to Africa to volunteer cost around £2000- £3000. I just know that if I was to go down the gap year route I would end up sat in my house watching Pokemon and eating snack a jacks. 

Please feel free to leave your experience and knowledge of this stuff, it would help a lot! Also, follow my blog please and I will love you forever!! :) :)